New Years Resolutions

Every year we all make these resolutions that a month in we have to abandon because we just can’t do it. We wanted to change something right away instead of working towards something. We make our resolutions so extreme and unrealistic that we are setting ourselves up for failure. So, this year I have decided to do things differently. Because I am done with failing year after year with my resolutions and after the year I’ve had I need some positivity in my life.

Two thousand and nineteen has been a roller coaster for our family. With many ups and downs and even some complete hoops thrown our way. And as 2019 came to an end I’ve been thinking over the year and how our family has grown not just stronger from the year’s obstacles but also closer.

Early on we learned my 13-year-old nephew was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor that is affecting his way of life. He had to quit all athletic activities, and since he has played football practically his entire life, that was the hardest to see. Due to the tumor effecting his left side with tremors and the loss of mobility he has had to start physical therapy and chemo for an 18-month cycle. He has had one biopsy done, meaning brain surgery to find out if the tumor was cancerous or not, which by God’s Grace, it is not. But unfortunately, it is in the dead center of his brain so there is no way to remove it, making it inoperable.

Then, we found out our rental property had been abandoned after it had been damaged to the point it was now in need of some major remodeling in order to get it livable again. After months of remodeling and thousands of dollars later, we finally got the house back on the market.

And after all the stress of the house, we found out both my 18-year-old niece and 21-year-old daughter were pregnant. And even though we are happy for the soon to be additions to our family, it was unexpected and we believe both to be too young and we wished they both would have been married beforehand. Some family members have been taking this as a very bad thing, but for me I like to think of the gifts God has given our family.  

But through this all, we are coming together as a family and continuing our every day lives.

With all this stress that has happened in the last few months I didn’t want to set myself up with another failed resolution. So, I used some research and I found when deciding to make a resolution for 2020.

Here’s some tips for making achievable resolutions.

1. Do not call it a resolution

When you think of it as a resolution, you have a better chance of failing. But if you name it “goals” or “achievements” you will see what you are doing differently, and statistically speaking you will be more successful. So for me, I set my “Goals for 2020”

2. Positivity wins everything.

With everything in life, if you think positive, there is a higher chance of success. Whether its work, family or personal, if you tend to be negative or pessimistic, there is a greater chance of failure. So being positive is a must when setting resolutions or goals.

3. Be clear on what it is you are wanting to succeed.

For instance, if you want to lose 50lbs, break it down to mini goals. If you just say you want to lose 50lbs, you may get discouraged if it takes you a long time. Instead set goals like losing 5lbs in the first month.

4. Slow process wins the race.

Remember you don’t need to meet your goals right away. Remember they are called “New Years Resolutions” for a reason, they are resolutions for the entire year. So set mini goals that are like baby steps to the big goal.

5. Be vocal about your goals.

By letting your family and friends know your goals, you have a better chance of being successful, because they will ask you how you are doing and hold you accountable. One of the biggest reasons people fail is because they struggle to keep themselves accountable and since they didn’t tell anyone what they were doing, there is no one to know if they stop or fail.

6. Breaks, Rewards and no quitting.

The most important thing you can do when making resolutions or goals for the next year is to take mini breaks so you don’t get worn out. On those breaks, reward yourself for all hard work you have done. But once you have given yourself a small reward, get back to work. Do not quit!

With these simple tips in mind, along with thinking of the obstacles of 2019, I set my goals to be obtainable and realistic. I needed less stress, more positivity, and more “me-time” in my life. So I set my goals as the following.

1. Read more.

Somewhere along the lines of becoming a wife and mother, I put reading on the backburner. I got into a rhythm of going to work, picking up baby, dinner, bedtime, repeat. So, I set the goal of reading more, because I haven’t been reading for pleasure. I didn’t set a number of books I wanted to read in the year or a number of hours because I wanted it to be obtainable. And reading more than none is obtainable. 😊

2. Walk every day.

Again, because I got into a rhythm, I didn’t set this as a priority. Due to my 5am-1:30pm work schedule and having to get up at 3:30 and be in bed by 8 every night I found it hard to walk every day. In fact I lacked energy to do much of anything outside of running errands. But now I am a full time stay at home mom, so I am making it a priority for myself, my husband, and my baby boy to get out of the house at least once a day to walk. We try to get in 2 miles a day, but as long as we get out of the house and walk we are hitting our goal. And I’ve learned the right shoes is a must. I’ve tried everything, but to be honest these are the most comfortable ones I’ve found. Women’s Ravenna 9 Road Running Shoe

3. Save money/get back to the baby steps of getting out of debt.

We try to live by the teachings of Dave Ramsey in our house, however due to the stress and obstacles of 2019, we have stepped away from this for awhile. So our goal for the year is to start fresh with Baby Step #1. If you would like to know more about this, read The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey.

4. Be Healthier.

Again, getting into a rhythm also means you lose track of the important stuff. Like eating healthier. Like exercise, like being a role model for your kids or family members. Or overall in tune with your health. Health = Living longer.

5. Making money off of my blog.

I added this as a goal, because it is important to me to contribute to my family. Since quitting my job to be a stay at home, I have saved our family $1700 a month from daycare, but I don’t feel like I am contributing. I see my husband constantly working, whether its at his 9-5 job, the Subway, or the rental property, he is constantly working. And constantly contributing. So if I can make even a few hundred from my blog a month, at least then I’d feel like I’m doing something for my family.

Goals or resolutions are important. Years past I have failed. Every year I have set the resolution to lose 50lbs and every year I have failed. This year I needed to change things up. I’m positive this year will be my best year.

Happy New Years.